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超微黑段子
时间:2021-02-06 10:20 作者: 故事大全
一
“我嚓，昨天见网友可把我给雷死了。还以为是美女mm，结果比鬼还丑。”
“真的比我还丑？”
说这话的人，一张脸迅速腐烂变形，眼珠子从眼眶中挤出来，猩红的舌头吐得老长。
二
“昨天我女朋友过生日，她收到我的礼物幸福得晕了过去。”
“吹牛，我不信。你送的是什么？”
“喏。”他解开衣服，露出左胸前一个硕大的血窟窿，“我的一颗真心。”
三
“你已经换了八个男朋友了，怎么还要找？你到底要找个什么样的？”
“呃……他永远不能对我说‘不’，和我在一起时只能有微笑一种表情，我煮的菜再难吃他也要吃下去……”
“太苛刻了，我估计没人能做到。”
“谁说的？我前八个男友都做到了。”
“那你还找？他们人呢？”
“在我家地下室里。”
四
“一天到晚的，真他娘的没意思。”
“那你去死吧。”
“那可不行。”
“为什么？”
“我已经死过一次了，不能再死了。”
五
“算命的说我活不过20岁，真是个大骗子。”
“好啦，快点吹蜡烛、切蛋糕吧。”
咣当。那人如一截干枯的朽木般轰然倒地，七孔流血，暴毙身亡。
蛋糕上用奶油写着，祝你20岁生日快乐。
六
“听说身体虚弱的人不宜扫墓，容易带走不干净的东西。”
“你怎么知道？”
“我就是那个跟在你身后回来的。”
七
“老大，这个墓都被盗空了，咱走吧？”
“想走？想得美。”
“啊！你是谁？老大……”
“喂，你在
汝阳民间鬼故事
那儿磨磨唧唧跟谁说话呢？赶紧跟上来！”八
“妈妈，这里好黑、好冷。我好怕。”
“乖，一会儿就好了。”
她拉开太平间里的某个冰柜，将冻得跟冰棍似的小女孩抱走了。
九
“老师，你要干什么？”
男人没说话，默默地将手伸向她的胸部。
“啊——”
男人举着半截断掌惨叫
民间故事王抄手打鬼故事
着在地上打滚儿。十
“‘天上的星星不说话，地上的娃娃想妈妈……’这是哪首歌的歌词？”
“《恐怖蜡像馆》。”
Introduce:One " my Ca, saw the netizen can die me to thunder yesterday. Still thinking is belle Mm, the result is uglier than ghost. " " uglier than me really? " the person that says this word, a piece of face decays quickly be out of shape, eyeball is squeezed from inside orbit come out, the tongue of blood-red is spat so that often grow. 2 " my girlfriend spent birthday yesterday, the gift happiness that she gets me dizzy past. " " boast, I am not believed. What is what you send? " " Nuo. " his unlock dress, show a huge hematic deficit, "My sincerity. " 3 " you had changed 8 boy friends, how to search even? Should you search after all what kind of? " " haw …… he can never say to me ' not ' , there can be a smile only when be together with me a kind of expression, the food that I cook is again insipid he also should eat go down …… " " too slashing, I reckon nobody can be accomplished. " " who says? Before me 8 male friend were accomplished. " " do then you still search? Where is their person? " " in my home basement. " 4 " of from morning till night, true of his woman uninteresting. " " then you go dead. " " that can be no good. " " why? " " I had died, cannot die again. " 5 " of fortune-telling say I had not lived 20 years old, it is a big cheater really. " " good, blow the candle quickly, cut cake. " with a bang become. If that person falls down with a loud crash like a hopeless case with one sere cut, 7 aperture bleed, cruel kill die. Writing with butter on cake, wish you birthday is happy 20 years old. 6 " hear body weakling is unfavorable pay respects to sb at his tomb, take away nasty thing easily. " " how do you know? " " I follow that in you to come back after one's death namely