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黑段子之我可不是人

2021-02-09 作者:故事大全 阅读:
  

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大街上只有三两个人游魂似的在行走,不时从远处传来一阵令人胆寒的尖叫声。

王二感到身上一阵发冷,不由得缩缩脖子,裹紧了衣服快步行走。

突然,从墙角钻出来一个鬼,雪白的头发,鲜红的舌头一直耸拉到胸前,瞪着两只铜铃一样的眼睛向王二扑过来。

王二吃了一惊,忙快速地+闪了过去。那个鬼顺势抓住了后面的一个路人,三两下就撕开了他的胸膛,挖出了一颗血淋淋的心脏,大口地吃了起来。那个人惨叫连连,很快就没气了。

王二吐了吐舌头,刚要走开,突然一个身着清朝官服的僵尸又出现在他面前。王二也飞似的逃跑,僵尸穷追不舍,凑巧它又碰到了一个路人,于是就恶狠狠地把那人抵在墙上,咬住他的脖子吸起血来。

王二庆幸地喘了一口气,刚抬起头,又看见一个青面獠牙的恶鬼挡住了去路。这下王二恼了,扑过去劈头盖脸地又打又骂:“妈的,老子有急事,你们这些龟孙子非要挡我的路!看来不给你点儿教训是不行了!”

鬼被王二打的惨叫连连,满脸是血,不住地哭喊道:“你还真打呀?导演,导演!”

这时,只听一声大喊:“停!”街道上一片大亮。紧接着一个大腹便便的人指着王二训斥起来:“这个群众演员是谁找来的,怎么能打人呢?让他立滚蛋!”

灯光下站着的一圈人都惶恐地摇着头,纷纷说这个群众演员不是自己找的。

王二不满地说:“他挡我的路,我凭什么不能打他?”

导演说:“你脑子进水了啊?我们这是在拍戏你懂不懂?你是人,怎么能打鬼呢?”

王二不好意思地挠着头说:“原来是拍戏呀,我还以为是真的呢。不过你说错了一点,我可不是人。”

导演骂道:“笨蛋,不是人你难道是鬼?”

“您说对了,我真的是一个过路的鬼。”

说着,王二的脸猛然扭曲起来,露出了青面獠牙的面目。

Introduce:Crescent moon is hanged high, air cooling is bleak, only 29 people swim on deserted ave walking like fetch, often transmit the scream of a be terrified making a person from far. Wang Er feels on the body one paroxysm is cold, can't help shrinking shrink neck, wrap tightened dress quickstep to walk. Abrupt, get out a spirit from the corner, snow-white hair, brigh

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t red tongue all the time before alarm pulls a bosom, goggle at the eye like two copper bell comes over to Wang Erpu. Wang Er ate one Jing, busy apace + showed the past. That ghost take advantage of an opportunity captured a passerby from the back, 29 chest that tore apart him, gouge a bloody heart, swobble rise. Then the inpidual screams again and again, did not enrage very quickly. Wang Er says a tongue, just wanted to go away, suddenly a corpse that wears Qing Chaoguan to take appears before him again. Wang Er also flies like desert, corpse is in hot pursuit, fortunately it came up against a passerby again, reach that pe

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rson ferociously on the wall then, his neck sucks bite into blood comes. Ground of Wang Erqing favour breathed heavily at a heat, just raised a head, the cacodaemon that sees a green-faced and long-toothed-terrifying in appearance again held off outlet. This issues Wang Ernao, attack ground of past right on the face hits again scold again: "Of Mom, father has urgent thing, you the road that these chelonian grandchildren must block me! Look giving you a lesson is washed-up! " the frightening cry that ghost is made by Wang Er again and again, it is blood all over the face, not the dwelling place cries cry: "Are you still hit really? Director, director! " at this moment, listen to cry greatly only: "Stop! " the street shin

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es one piece greatly on the road. A back-to-back potbellied person is pointing to Wang Erxun denounce to rise: "Who looks for this masses actor, how can you lay a person? Let him immediately scram! " the circuit person that is standing below lamplight t

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errified ground is shaking first, say those who search to this masses actor is not him in succession. Wang Er says malcontently: "He blocks my road, by what cannot I hit him? " the director says: "Does your brain drink water ah? We is this to taking sport don't you understand? You are a person, how can you play dirty trick? " Wang Er feels embarrassed the ground is flinching the head says: "Be to take sport so, it is true that I still think. Do not cross your missay a bit, I can not be a person. " the director scolds: "Fool, be a person are you ghost? " " you say to be opposite, I am the ghost of a pass by really. " saying, wang Er's face abruptly twist rises, showed the face of green-faced and long-toothed-terrifying in appearance.

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